Your Emails Sound Like Everyone Else’s. That’s the Problem

If you feel like your email open rates have flatlined harder than a Love Island contestant trying to crack a joke, you’re not alone. Businesses across the UK are firing out emails that sound like they were written by the same bloke. And your customers? They're tired of it. 

It looks as if your emails sound like everyone else’s. And that’s exactly why no one’s reading them. 

We’re not here to give you a how-to guide on writing the "perfect" subject line or whether emojis will save your CTR. That’s not the point. What you need to understand is why your emails are invisible, ignored, or worse—instantly deleted. 

So grab a cuppa, and let’s break down the real problem with your email marketing strategy. Spoiler alert: it’s not the font you’re using.

The Invisibility Crisis in Your Inbox 

Email inboxes are warzones. Every day, your customers are bombarded with messages screaming for attention. Discounts, new arrivals, urgent calls to action, all sandwiched between their bank updates and their nan’s cat memes. 

Now, when your email lands looking and sounding like every other bland, boilerplate message, guess what happens? It disappears. Not because people hate email. Far from it. Email still delivers one of the highest ROIs in digital marketing. But it only works when you stop treating it like a box-ticking exercise. 

Sending a monthly newsletter because "we probably should"? That’s not strategy. That’s spam with better grammar.

Why Playing It Safe Is Costing You 

Marketing isn’t about playing it safe. It’s about standing out. Yet most emails look like they were churned out by an overworked intern with a Mailchimp template and a prayer. 

This happens because businesses copy what they think should work. They copy competitors. They read "best practice" blogs. They write what they think sounds professional. But sounding professional often just means sounding forgettable. 

Here’s the truth: You’re not just competing against other businesses. You’re competing against the delete button. And the delete button is winning. 

When every email starts with "Hi [First Name]," features the same stock header image, and ends with "Click here to learn more," your audience zones out. Fast.

What Makes People Actually Read Emails? 

It’s not hacks. It’s not templates. It’s relevance, personality, and timing. 

People open and engage with emails that feel like they were written for them. Not everyone. Them. This is where most businesses fumble. They broadcast instead of connect. 

If your CRM is just firing out the same generic email to 5,000 contacts, you’re doing it wrong. You need a CRM that thinks like a marketer. One that doesn’t just store data—it uses it to make every message feel personal, timely, and sharp as a pint at last orders. 

UltimateCRM was built exactly for this. It helps you build campaigns based on behaviour, interests, and interactions. So your audience doesn’t just receive emails—they experience them.

Personality Isn’t Optional, It’s Essential 

Now, we’re not saying every email needs to be a comedy routine. But if your brand had a face, would it have a pulse? 

People want to hear from humans, not marketing bots. That means writing with voice, not just information. A bit of wit, a touch of cheek, a slice of realness. 

Look at the best email marketers in the game. They make you want to read the next line. They make you feel something. Whether it’s a laugh, a nod of agreement, or even mild outrage, emotion is what drives action. And that’s what you want: clicks, replies, conversions.

Timing Isn’t Everything—But It’s Close 

Here’s the rub. Even the most brilliantly crafted email is useless if it hits at the wrong time. Send a "Let’s chat about your 2025 budget" email at 5pm on a Friday and you might as well throw it in the Thames. 

The smartest marketers don’t just look at what to send. They focus on when. That’s where a marketing-focused CRM like UltimateCRM earns its keep. It learns from your audience’s behaviour. It knows when they open, click, buy, bounce. And it uses that data to make sure your message lands when they’re most likely to engage. 

This isn’t guesswork. It’s precision. It’s the kind of strategic edge that turns a good campaign into a great one.

Your CRM Should Be Your Best Marketer 

Most CRMs are about as helpful as a chocolate teapot when it comes to actual marketing. They’re built for sales teams, not marketers. 

UltimateCRM is different. It was designed from the ground up with marketing at its core. That means smarter segmentation, better automation, and campaigns that actually convert. 

It’s your marketing Swiss Army knife—built to help you understand, target, and engage your audience properly. And when your email marketing is built on a CRM that knows what it’s doing, you stop guessing. You start delivering.

Email Myths That Need Retiring 

Right, let’s squash some of the most common myths that are quietly tanking your results: 

Myth 1: Shorter is always better. Not true. People will read long emails—if they’re interesting. If you’re losing readers after the first paragraph, the problem isn’t length, it’s content. 

Myth 2: Fancy design equals better performance. Over-designed emails often look like promotions. Promotions look like spam. Simple, clean layouts with strong copy often outperform flashy ones. 

Myth 3: Tuesday at 10am is the golden hour. Timing depends on your audience. Stop following generic advice. Start tracking your own open data. Better yet, let your CRM optimise it for you.

What Real Solutions Look Like 

Real results come from thinking like your customer, not your boardroom. Here’s what to focus on: 

1. Use your CRM to build behaviour-driven segments. If someone only clicks your emails when there’s a discount, don’t send them full-price fluff. Send offers. If another segment reads every product review you send, focus your content there. 

2. Test tone, not just content. You’d be amazed how differently people respond to the same message said in a cheeky tone versus a corporate one. Split-test your tone occasionally. Use your CRM to track response rates. 

3. Stop sending dead-weight emails. Your database isn’t a trophy cabinet. Clean it. Re-engage or remove cold contacts. A smaller, engaged list will outperform a bloated one every time. 

4. Invest in smart automation. Set up welcome sequences, abandoned cart emails, post-purchase check-ins—anything that feels timely and relevant. Automation isn’t about working less; it’s about connecting smarter.

So, What Should You Be Doing? 

Instead of asking "How do we get more opens?" ask, "Why would someone care about this email?" 

Instead of wondering "Should we add a GIF?" ask, "Does this message sound like us—or just another brand going through the motions?" 

And most importantly, stop trying to talk to everyone. You’re not a national newspaper. You’re a business with a personality, a purpose, and a product that solves real problems. Your emails should reflect that. 

Don’t be another unread notification. Be the message they actually look forward to. And if you’re not sure how to get there, that’s what we’re here for.

Let’s Make Your Emails Unmissable 

If your emails feel more like digital tumbleweeds than conversation starters, it’s time for a rethink. Book your FREE marketing strategy session today. 

We’ll review what you’re doing, show you what’s actually working across the industry, and map out the right way forward—no guesswork, no fluff, just results. 

Because you don’t need to do everything. You just need to do the right things, the right way. And that starts with an email strategy that finally sounds like you.